7 signs of emotional healing

When we are healing from emotional trauma our behaviors begin to change. As we place a higher priority on our emotional health, we change the way we respond to the world around us.

You no longer argue

There may have been a time when having others acknowledge that we were right would have us arguing our point until we were ready to pull our hair out. We needed this validation to prove to us, more than anyone else, that our memories and knowledge of things weren’t skewed and that, frankly, we weren’t crazy.

As we heal from trauma we need less of this validation and realize that arguing is exhausting, time-consuming, and often unsatisfying. When this happens, we simply allow others to be wrong because we know that we’re right and that’s all that matters.

You no longer react to inconsequential things

Where once we thought that every little thing that wrong in our lives was somehow connected to everything else that has gone wrong in our lives, we grow to understand that sometimes stuff just happens. The Universe isn’t out to get us. We aren’t unlucky. We are human and little annoyances are a part of life.

We may have also had a tendency to react with anger or sadness to things that we read or saw on the internet. Perhaps we made comments and picked fights with people we didn’t even know. As we heal, we realize that nothing good comes from these interactions and simply scroll by the things that used to upset us.

You no longer seek outward validation

We no longer need compliments and praise to fuel our confidence. We may stop posting so many selfies online. We are learning our value and are no longer dependent on the acceptance of others to make us feel worthy.

You don’t wake up to worry

Remember those mornings when you opened your eyes and the first thought that crossed your mind was how everything could go wrong? We worried about everything and started our days rife with negativity. We even invented scenarios to worry about.

As we heal, we see things from a more positive perspective and sleep and wake with a calmer mind.

You care more about your health than your looks

Diet and exercise become lifestyle choices that we make for our health and longevity. Before we healed we may have hopped on fad diets or starved ourselves to look better. Now, we follow regiments that make us stronger and healthier.

You can recognize emotional triggers

When something doesn’t feel right, we can now get ahead of it and prevent panic and emotional outbursts. We know what sets us off and how to cope with or even prevent the situation from occurring.

We have learned to avoid the people and situations that make us feel bad and when we can’t avoid them, we know how to protect ourselves from them.

You trust the process more than the person

Our relationships improve because we have learned that we can’t make someone love us. We no longer spy on or give our partners the third degree. We did those things because we wanted to be sure that the person we wanted wasn’t going to hurt us. We have now realized that we are capable of choosing worthy partners and trust that we will be together only if we are compatible and capable of loving ourselves and each other. We trust the process of falling in love and having a relationship and if we fail, we know it wasn’t meant to be and move on.  

Remember that healing doesn’t mean an end to trauma. The circumstances that left us scarred happened and are part of our reality. Healing simply means that the trauma no longer controls our thinking and emotional well-being.

This article originally published at https://tomilynchromance.medium.com/7-signs-of-emotional-healing-3cfed2088bc3